What a week. I am exhausted, so I am not exactly sure how far I will go with tonight's story. I may have to pick it up and continue over the weekend.
Have you ever noticed how a week can begin on an intensity like an incoming hailstorm and end like the soft whisper of a butterfly? I am always awed by times in my life that are both great and terrible at the same time. As one part becomes harsher, another becomes equally exquisite.
I spent the better part of the week dealing with attorneys. But I don't really want to focus on that. We started the week discussing imaginary lovers, and never quite finished the exchange. I may do my attorney rant another day...I'll see if I am in that kind of a feisty mood. Until then, I'll forget about them. You can all breathe a sigh of relief.
Spring is in the air. I know this because this week a few of my male friends checked in with me. They needed some Catherine torture sessions.
Keith called from Grass Valley. He never gives up hope that somehow this redheaded pain in the a** lady he adores has changed, He calls just to check in an confirm that I am still (to him) the same. Heidi coined the phrase, "What goes on in Grass Valley stays in Grass Valley". It just so happens Grass Valley is part of her work territory - I really don't think it's kharma, no matter how much Elisabet wishes it so.
I can't ever stay too mad at Keith for very long. Every time he has come to visit and spoil me he always asks for my "Honey do" list and goes about fixing everything on that list. One might think this to be the ideal relationship, except we fight like crazy. Keith has the ability to get on my last nerve and midway through our wonderful time together we are in eachother's face over some minor detail. I hate fighting and I hate the way we fight, so what lives in Grass Valley definately needs to stay in Grass Valley.
I think Keith is just fine with that too.
Then Peter called, who we all love to still refer to as "San Jose man" because I went a year not remembering his first name. But like that faithful lab retriever, he always checks on me. He is only 22, but wise about understanding that people should be checked in on. I remain his 'touchstone' and listen intently as he tells me of his dreams for his future. He has done so much with his life. He has his pilots license and just passed his real estate exam. He also has his MCSE and is a Network Administrator. I am impressed by someone at such a young age going for it in every part of their life. He is going to do great things. He is a kind man and very driven, I just wish he was older and lived a little closer. I would love to have him as my work out coach. Plus, he handles me just fine. Hell, that makes him a friggin Saint.
The thing I like about both these men is that fact that I do not intimidate them. And, they both make me laugh.
My brother called this week too. He sounds like a young man again. It reminded me of our college years when we hung out together. God we had fun. He had the cutest friends. He did introduce me to my first love, Rich, after trying to get me to meet Rich for a year. We were togther most of my 20's. I think my brother is still quite proud of that 'set up'. Rich was a nice guy....but not my soul mate. All the wishing and dreaming just could not make it so.
Ryan also called. He is the most upbeat man that I have ever met. His phone calls are like a ray of brilliant sunshine that burst through the phone into my soul. The minute I hear his voice and that familiar "Hey Cath!" jingle I always smile. His exuberence for life and how precious each moment is refreshes my spirit. He always makes me laugh out loud so hard that I feel it in my toes. He has never said one mean thing to me - ever. He has never once hurt my feelings. What a speacial person he is. He likes my wild side. He knows that part of me will never be tamed. Smart man.
Bill Instant Messaged me this week to see how I am doing too. That was nice. He typed an "I love you'. Sweet thoughts from a very stubborn man.
I had one of those two hour middle of the night phone calls with Osc. Every time I talk with him I realize how much he just doesn't understand me at all. Our conversations are funny, witty and move like a tango until he begins to overthink the fact that we connect well together. But. what woman would want to hang around a man that just doesn't get her...no matter how much he makes her laugh? Not to mention the fact that this particular man will never be "the one". Yet, he ironically worries that somehow we will end up togther. I don't think he has stared long and hard enough at my wall of dreams to see that he is not pictured there. I find it odd that a man would think that I might think so little of myself that I would set aside my dreams for so little. Even more important, that a man would think that my life lacks the beauty, depth, honor, wonder and magic that we know I create, to show any interest in such a bullsh** offer. I'd rather paint my toe nails.
Meanwhile my garden is coming together beautifully. It is amazing what a redhead can create with all the pent up sexual tension.
Oh, and my imaginary lover is also good with his hands...
Until next time...
C
