Ok, so its not like I didn't see this coming. In my gut I knew this was bound to surface with Brian. I, the Amazon woman married a very wirey agile excellent rugby player. His high school football stats still have not been challenged. Soooooooo what happens when you combine an Amazon woman from an Amazon family with a lean muscular type... you get one large, very strong young boy.
Brian is 10 wearing size 14 clothes and fits in my running shoes. I can see where this is going. The men from my side of the family (are) were huge. I excelled at ballet, volleyball, ice-skating and my favorite - weight lifting. I was a honors student and sports were always an easy A - along with most subjects. My x husband did terrible in school but was a star athlete. He was smart enough to pick exactly the type of woman that would create a super son athlete - in his mind anyways. I myself, keep pushing the scientist route.
So this Sunday I get to go see Brian fit for a Helmet. How did we get here? Brian has decided that he wants to play football and be an archeologist. How these two come togther I have no idea. I did manage to stay out of it. Even though, I rather he learned golf or baseball (hey its the irish in me), I do understand that as a mother, I have to let Brian make some of his own choices - even at the age of 10.
My concern, since my x husband played football is that he is not projecting his own hopes onto his son. But then, what one of us parents don't do this a bit ourselves? Where do you think Brian's love of Science comes from? Of course, whatever Brian chooses for his life is fine. I admire him greatly and he is only 10, I am sure watching his life unfold will be every bit as amazing as it already has been.
I love jazz and listen to the local station here quite a bit. I love how jazz fills a place when all the windows are wide open. Jazz is meant to be the background music for life. Sade has a song "By Your Side" and the lyrics always make me think of Brian...
"You think I'd leave your side baby?
You know me better than that
Think I'd leave you down
When you're down on your knees?..."
"...Ohh, when you're cold
I'll be there
Hold you tight to me
When you're on the outside
Baby, and you can't get in
I would show you
You're so much better than you know
When you're lost, you're alone
Can't get back again
I will find you
Darlin' and I'll bring you home..."
Hmmmm ... great melody. But then, if you haven't guessed by now, I am just crazy about my son. And he is going to be my football boy. It just goes by too fast. Yesterday he was reaching up, pointing his finger saying "UP!" and now he leans over, with a sly smile and says "Mom, you are wierd, but I love you anyways" and rolls around in a fit of giggles.
He put on my sandals and says, "See mom they fit, do you have big feet?" Ok, I am skrewed either way I answer that, but years as a woman have taught me some things "What do you think?" I shoot back. "You have small feet" HA! This kid wants something...
Oh lord, I just thought of something - I am going to have sport sock smell. Practice starts Monday night. Today is the last day of my life until Christmas.
Until next time-
C.
PS. My imaginary lover likes to wash sports socks...
