This weekend I am spending time taking steps toward making my dreams come true. It is a truly blissful experience to put oneself on the line and step out and take risks toward destiny. I learned "Isolation is the dream killer" and was able to spend time in San Francisco, a city I deeply love. There is a 'high' that comes with finding the road that is going to take us to places we couldn't even begin to imagine on a good day.
I have noticed at times when my life is changing before my eyes and I sense an end to an era that a piece of special music seems to represent the time forever. When my marriage was ending, and I was taking the necessary steps to get out the song by Duran Duran "Ordinary World" was always on the radio. I related to every single word of that song. The song always makes me remember Trace, who from Minnesota (Tgreengirl508) held my hand from across the miles and saved me. Every time we spoke on the phone the song would come on and I would cry and she would tell me that I was amazing, strong and wonderful and I was going to do great things with my life.
It was a raining Saturday afternoon when my x husband moved his final pieces of furniture into his place and said "I hope you know what you are doing" and walked out of my life forever (well forever in the sense of being my companion). I shut the door and the radio station began to play "Ordinary World" as tears flowed down my cheeks. I gave him all the TV's, all the movies, kept the stereo and chose music as my source of entertainment. There are many friends here online who remember those days ...Trace ... Dale ... Dan ... Saio ... Steve ... Tara ... MaryPat ... John ... Vincent ... Mark ... KB ... such a wonderful support system...
Don't you have music that represents different periods in your life? "I Go Crazy" by Paul Davis represents the year I graduated from High School, lost my father, started college and broke up with my high school sweetheart. Whenever it comes on a radio, it transforms me like a time machine back to 1978 and that crazy tumultuous year.
"Every Breath You Take" by the Police reminds me of Rich and when (in college) we became serious. "Downtown Train" by Rod Stewart takes me back to the days I was living in Tiburon, riding the Tiburon Ferry into work at Continental Savings and dating Steve, a US Treasury Agent. Every time I hear the song I can smell the salt air of the bay and see the SF skyline fade into the distance from the back of the Ferry.
"My Favorite Mistake" by Sheryl Crow makes me think of riding on the back of Patrick's motorcycle during the days I was still fighting to get divorced. Patrick and I were so wrong, but he did see me through a rough patch in my life. "Kissed By A Rose" makes me think of Mark and when I began to travel across the US on planes to work in different parts of the country...far way from my little Brian.
Eiffel 65's "Blue" makes me smile and think of Brian and how we would dance around the kitchen of the cottage house. I remember the Christmas lights we hung across the kitchen ceiling and left up until the day we moved. We would often flip them on and have our own little dance party in the kitchen. He is such fun.
And these days it's "You're Beautiful" by James Blunt. It makes me think of Joy and how he'd be proud of me for fearlessly chasing my dreams. I will always remember his face in the Denver Embassy Suites' bar when he saw me for the first time. It took my breath away and etched his place in my heart forever.
My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I'm sure.
She smiled at me on the subway.
She was with another man.
But I won't lose no sleep on that,
'Cause I've got a plan.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true,
I saw your face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
Cause I'll never be with you.
Yeah, she caught myeye,
As I walked on by.
She could see from my face that I was,
Flying high,
And I don't think that I'll see her again,
But we shared a moment that will last till the end.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
When she thought up that I should be with you.
But it's time to face the truth,
I will never be with you
Here's wishing all of you dreamy songs and long held dreams coming true. Until next time-
C
