I was thinking about my mother tonight, while laying in bed, recounting this weekend's events in my mind like a short film. She is the queen of subtle and I don't know what I'd do without her steady stream of unwavering support.
It's Brian's birthday party weekend and I was in full swing from Thursday on, making sure no detail was too small. I love to throw a good party - even if it is a children's affair. I like parties to be the type where the neighborhood feels welcome. However, in my zeal to get my x husband's place ready for Brian's day I pulled a muscle in my lower back. By late Friday evening aspirin was not taking the edge off the shooting pain in my right hip.
Looking through my medicine cupboard I came across some Vicodin I never used. There were only four, given to me for when I broke that toe last year. A sample from the doctore 'just in case'. I never took them, because I don't like Vicodin, and as with aging, could not remember why. Like some freak gift from the gods I took one in the hopes I could sleep well on a heating pad and wake up refreshed and ready for Brian's party.
Oh hell no sista.
You see, I did not realize Vicodin is synthetic codine and I am allergic to codine. Give me tylenol with codine and I will puke up the skin off the bottom of my feet just as sure as the sun comes up. An hour into sleeping on Friday night and I awoke to the most terrible stomach ache that I could remember. There was no tums in the house, but I did find the pink bottle of chalk mixed with Beech nut gum, metal and elmers glue, more popularly known as Peptol Bismol.
Out comes a dusty old shot glass, which I proceed to clean and begin the ritual of Pepto-Bismol 'shots'. Oh what a glamorous life I lead, there in the kitchen in my sweat jammies doing pink shots of chalk on a Friday night. Unfortunately for me, unlike alcohol shots that work on getting one drunk, the pink shots from hell were not curing my belly ache to the same degree. It was beginning to feel like the alien was about to pop out through my stomach wall.
I take the heating pad, move to my writing chair and begin drinking straight from the peptol bottle, using a seltzer water chaser, Certainly this has to work. I would doze off for a few minutes from exhaustion, to be jolted awake by a stomach spasm. There was no way I was waking Brian and going to the hospital, so I paced the floor, sure I could walk it off. I stayed up all night.
As I stand drained, rubbing a sore belly, Brian awakes at 7am excited that I am already up and ready to go. The pains have died down somewhat, but I am not about to risk coffee. Coffee seemed like adding a fork stab to an open wound. Into the shower I go.
Now my redheaded Irish luck doesn't stop here, as my phone begins ringing at 9:30. It seems one boys game will end early, another changed his plans, Brian's grandma contacted an old friend and he is coming - oh my God - suddenly Brian is having a big birthday party. Do we have enough food?
In my usual style I arrive at my x's and swing into action decorating and getting things ready. One might wonder why we are having it at my x's and not at our place since I am doing all the work. Brian's dad's place has a pool in the condo complex, his place is larger and Brian wanted a swim party. Sorry men, but most of you are not great at doing the party thing. You'd throw a bucket of Kentucky fried chicken on the table and call it a day.
And of course when we arrived, nothing was in place as he had promised, so I began to do the last finishing touches on preparing for the party. I worked my ass off to say the least. With the exception of poor little Andrew and his 104 temperature, all the boys managed to come to the party after all, plus Sam from Brian's old school (who Brian hasn't seen in three years) plus some neighborhood kids Brian found to invite but forgot to tell me.
And my mom.
My blessed mom arrived, chairs and food in hand, who was quick to tell me that Vicodin is synthetic codine and what the hell was I thinking?? Do I not remember that I am allergic to codine? The nurse in her looks me over. How I am managing is anyone's guess - pure love for Brian makes it's own energy for me.
The party was a complete success and in my usual grand style, the neighbors walk over and enjoy the barbecue and pieces of cake. Boonie the dog maneuvers the party using her tongue as a magnet, secretly stealing bits of tasty treats from boys plates while they are distracted. The fat kitty follows Boonie around, but uses a more effective, sweet "Meow" and a leg rub to get someone to give her treats from their plate.
My mother gives Brian several movies as a gift, but there's one in particular she wants Brian to watch "to see his mother" as she puts it. The movie is: The Prize Winner of Defiance Ohio. I thought she meant that I look like Julianne Moore, which people tell me from time to time depending on her latest movie role. I decide to bring the movie home with me because I was curious what mom's reason was to give it to Brian. As exhausted as I was, I put on PJ's and put the movie in the DVD at 9:30pm. I was soon to find out the Julianne Moore resemblance was not what she was referring to at all.
Transfixed, I watched this movie tell the story of a woman, who's husband always spends all the money, and shows her way of coping and raising her children. I then realize how much my mother sees in me, and how wonderfully kind she thinks my actions are. You know, you often wonder how your parents see you and how much of the "real you" they really see. My mother sees more of the "true me" than I ever imagined. Funny the things a girl can learn at 45... It was a wonderful compliment. I relaxed in the thought of " if this is how my mother sees me, then I have done all right by her". It was like getting an A+ in Motherhood from the top professor.
The movie was hard to watch at times, although my x husband is not a drinker, the similarities in the dynamics of their relationship hit a little too close to home. Somehow I always manage to 'fix it' in Brian's world. I paused after the movie ended and thought of my day ...
Hell, there I was in front of my mom running around managing my x at the barbecue, chasing kids, fixing corn, salad, rolls and traditional outdoor fair, while negotiating swim sessions with the boys. I made sure everyone had a great time. Brian was in heaven, and as with each year, hugged me as I left him for his sleep-over, "Mom, this was the best birthday party ever!"
Well my dear Brian, you are simply the best boy ever.
And I woke up at noon on Sunday...
Until next time-
C
