Today is the perfect Fall day, the sun is warm and the sky crisp blue with a light slightly cold breeze that comes up about every 20 minutes or so – a perfect afternoon to write a story, then take the dog for a hike around the lake. I thought about a few things this week while Elisabet came to stay, some redhead musings from the rattling of my mind. With Elisabet in my home, we finish the days with a glass of wine, place our bare feet up upon the coffee table and discuss our lives. Her life is that of wife, mother and self-employed businesswoman living away from her ring of friends and mine is that of the divorced single mom, self-employed businesswoman dreaming of another life living away from Santa Rosa.
Interwoven within the folds of my life are the dreams I have for my son, which mostly boil down to his happiness, peace and contentment. It is a tough call as a parent to try and chose between your own dreams and their wishes and how the two affect our kids. It is like staring at several closed doors, wondering if you walk through one of them, how the world behind will look, will your children like it and bloom there. Sometimes the toughest choice is to make no choice, to stare at the doors and wait while your kids enjoy this moment of time they are in.
This is one of the many reasons I chose not to settle into the dating world with a man. I still haven't walked through one of those doors and moved on to my next life. Many people are concerned with hooking up with someone to the point that their kids become the lesser issue. When I date a man and his behavior forces a choice of Brian being a lesser issue, the guy must go.
Being with someone for the sake of being with someone has never been my dating mantra. I like my time alone, it is wonderful to do your own thing.
However, if any men are interested in the mistakes made with single mothers, I can certainly tell you some.... read on.
C
